Listening to triggering music

[creative_writer]

I'm lonely

[Ru-bee]

Hi @creative_writer I'm around if you'd like to chat

What has your day been like so far?

[creative_writer]

@Ru-bee it bothers me that I’ve filled my day focusing on my spirituality but I still feel lonely. I can’t say I’m alone, I have family around, but still lonely

[Ru-bee]

Does focusing on your spirituality usually bring you a sense of connection @creative_writer?

Has something happened today that's left you feeling disconnected from those around you, or misunderstood, or has this loneliness been something that you have been feeling for a while?

[creative_writer]

@Ru-bee spirituality does help me feel connected, but why am I still feeling lonely?

Nothing has happened today, just not feeling the best. I’m very exhausted and I think I’ve been sleeping more lately. My whole body feels heavy

[Ru-bee]

Maybe that tiredness is a part of not feeling the connection today @creative_writer?

I'm wondering if there's anything else that generally helps with feelings of loneliness?

[creative_writer]

@Ru-bee maybe the tiredness doesn’t help. I do feel lonely to some degree everyday. I’m not sure what I can do about it, I’ve just learnt to live with it. Being around people doesn’t mean you are going to feel less lonely

[Jynx]

Hiya @creative_writer how's your Monday? 

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@creative_writer wrote:
repeating my story sort of keeps me stuck in the past. I know on some level I need to talk about it. My thoughts suffocate me.

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Hmmm... I wonder if it's less about the repeating of the story and more about how it is received? Like I know you have definitely gotten some pretty crappy reactions from folks, but even if they aren't immediately shutting you down, the quality of the connection matters. Receiving an invalidating, misattuned, or even just mis-timed response when we're disclosing trauma can shut down any potential for healing, whilst also reinforcing the message that talking about it only results in pain. Food for thought anyway.

What are you up to this arvo?

[creative_writer]

@Jynx I have left therapy on a number of occasions feeling absolutely shattered. It can be de-stabilising. I am less likely to leave therapy absolutely shattered if I don’t talk about details. Or perhaps I felt more comfortable with my SANE counsellor, I don’t know. I didn’t really go into details during those sessions as they were time limited, so it probably wasn’t appropriate. I also want to have people in my personal life I can open up to a certain extent, but I do exercise extreme caution in how much I disclose. In a way I am glad that I no longer get hurt by other people’s scepticism, but it is lonely

[Jynx]

@creative_writer Yeah not surprised when the experiential evidence you do have is that sharing your story leaves you feeling destabilised. The quality of the connection matters a lot more than what is shared, so maybe have a think about what it was about your sessions with the SANE counsellor that were different, or that helped you to feel seen, heard, and understood?