an honest discussion (tw suicide)

[lavenderhaze]

Hey @Eden1919, 

I am so sorry that everything is so difficult at the moment

I'll send you an email, please respond to that ❤️

[defaultusername]

That's really good that you saw your psychologist yesterday @Eden1919, and perhaps you could reframe them contacting the mental health crisis team as something that could be a good thing for you. Try to keep in mind that all involved would just want to help look after you and keep you safe.

None of us here think of you as a 'hopeless cause', and neither will they.

It's always lovely to hear back from you.

Try to be kind to yourself, you deserve it 🧡

defaultusername

[Eden1919]

well i have been sick all week with the flu and have felt absolutely terrible. my case manager called me and he was absolutely useless he just talked at me the whole time and told me i wasnt special and that everyone feels this way sometimes and then i spoke to the psychiatrists whos plan is to do absolutely nothing and basically just told me i need to lose weight and that that will make me less suicidal so i have given up on seeking help from useless people and if i decided to die on whatever day i will just do it quietly and be done with it i am absolutely done with it all there is no point trying anymore there is no help out there for me which i already kinda knew but this has all just confirmed it. anyway i am safe for tonight i think but as for how long that lasts who knows. 

[Eden1919]

idk what to do anymore i am so exhausted but no matter how much i sleep it is never enough i feel like crying all the time i havent been able to do anything even daily self care has gone out the window let alone my uni work and idk what else to do anymore i have tried everything i can to make things better but nothing is working and all the drs care about is me losing weight i really dont know what to do anymore i dont and none of this is sustainable i cant keep going like this i cant i think i am safe for tonight but idk i just everything is too much and i am not coping. 

[lavenderhaze]

Hi @Eden1919 

I hear how difficult things are for you at the moment, and you're not feeling heard and supported.

Thank you for confirming your safety ❤️

I am here to sit with you and have a chat about how you're feeling 

[defaultusername]

Hey @Eden1919,

I am so sorry to hear about your experience with your case manager and psychiatrist, that's the last thing you need right now...

Same as @lavenderhaze I am also here if you feel you need to reach out.

I hope that today is better for you.

Please know that you're not alone,

defaultusername

[Ilovepenguins]

Hey @Eden1919,

I'm so sorry to see that you're still struggling! I was hoping the break over christmas would have given you some time, without the stress of uni on your shoulders, to relax and to be able to work on your self care. Never mind though, I'm so proud of you that you're still here and your still pushing through every day, and seeking support when you need it ❤️ 

Have you ever used or considered using the private mental health hospital network? I know you've said that you've done the whole hospital thing before but, in my experience, the public system can be more damaging. The private hospital system though was much more helpful. It was almost like a holiday actually! I understand that the cost can be quite high but the cost was worth it with the help of private health insurance and there are some really nice hospitals available. 

Sending you heaps of love @Eden1919 ❤️❤️

[Ilovepenguins]

Hey @Eden1919, 

I wanted to let you know I was thinking of you today and just wanted to check in and see how you're tracking along 💚