Lived Experience Forum

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @Former-Member ..... 😊 👋

Just wanted to tell you ..... I don't diet.

I eat to fuel my body for the sort of day I expect to have.  

If I am not doing much, I choose lighter type foods.  If I am cold, I eat something warm and filling.  If I am hot, it's nice to have something refreshing and cool, but I don't have rules about that .... only "this is okay, but this would be better ...." eg, on a hot day if I want to eat ice cream, it's better to have it with some fruit, like sliced mango, which I love, and maybe a drizzle of bottled Passionfruit pulp .... and then I can reasonably call it a meal ..... and I don't feel like eating the whole tub of ice cream, or the whole tin of mangos, or the whole jar or Passionfruit pulp.  If I do feel like having some more, I have a mug of tea with milk, and then stop and ask myself whether I still feel like having more.  Usually the answer is no,

Its hard to eat a large bowl of muesli ... but I don't just like any muesli ... so I have considered them well as to which one I would like, and I usually use it as a sprinkle on top of yogurt with .... you guessed it .... mango and Passionfruit pulp .... 😆

I really like cheese, so I have it in a fresh-bread sandwich with chunky cut tomato and lettuce, and real butter .... and it's really nice, but if I want some more, I make a big mug of tea, and after that I consider whether I would still like some more .... and the answer is usually no.

I could go on listing foods I like all night .... cos I like food .... but I think you get the idea of how I go about things.

You can keep different sized bowls in the cupboard .... one that holds one cupful of food, one that holds two cupfuls of food, and one that holds three cupfuls of food, and tell yourself that you can only use each bowl once in the day (not set in stone, but as a general rule), so you need to decide which meats across the day you are going to have in each bowl.  I can only eat about two tablespoons of muesli with milk for instance, so that would be the "baby bear" bowl .. and it's nice with a Coffeemate vanilla pod tipped into it btw .... sell them in Woolies too ....

Hope this helps ... quiz me for more ideas if you like ....

❤️💕

[Former-Member]

Oh thanks @Faith-and-Hope, got that, there's some really good tips there, different, and workable, thank you. I have a folder called F&H treasures where I cut & paste such pearls of yours. Thank you. xox

[Owlunar]

Hi @Former-Member@Faith-and-Hope

I don't believe in diets either - a diet is what you eat - actually take in - and having limits that are set in concrete soon collapse into dust - I don't think I have ever tried a diet

In fact it's a pain - all the time they advertise food on TV and yet they also have programmes telling us what's bad to eat and how do we know?. They have the programme about the biggest lose r on atm and next they will have another one of those extravagant cooking shows - aw - how tangled all of this is

I guess all we can do is be careful - aware that added sugar is in most things and make wise and/or informed decisions - but then there is exercise - and I wonder about people who have to exercise when they have a hard time with it - really - that must be so hard

But then - I omitted one thing from my intake - that is my favourite chocolate covered caramels and I am noticing the difference already -

Yeah - cockie deprivation is terrible - but alas - I really do want to get rid of the spare tyre

All the best @Former-Member

Dec

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @Spookytookims  

This thread started life as an info thread about eating disorders.  Then Tawney opened an Eating Disorder thread on Lived Experience forum (that us now the first post on this thread) and the e.d. info was added to it, but the thread kept here under What's New ..... (confused yet ?) .... instead if Something's Not Right  .....  then the post immediately above this one was taken to Something's Not Right ..... 

Confused story short .... if you scroll back up through this thread you will find the combination of different forms of eating disorder that WH has branched into.  An eating disorders counsellor recently told me that he has OCD as a driver behind the eating disorder, and it's branching into a wide variety of eating disordered and OCD behaviours, because it reaches a point of saturation where it is no longer satisfying his need, and growing laterally rather than vertically, if that makes sense.  It's like an addiction where it keeps growing.

Just thought you might prefer the bigger picture to joining all the dots I have scattered across the forums.

💜🌷

F&H

[Spookytookims]

yeah that does make sense to me @Faith-and-Hope.   It's like what I was saying to you the other day re compassion fatigue and pushing boundaries so to speak, but a different form of it.

It's like any addiction or behaviour really.  Once you push to an edge, human nature pretty much dictates that's your new baseline so you have to push further or add in another element to broaden the experience. I guess it's part of us, as humans, so we feel that exploratory need and not stagnate even on a species survival level.

The problem is when the chosen behaviour is destructive to us, that same need to expand rather than shut down , or back off, s still there unless we sense an immediate danger.  So in a way we are fighting against our instincts when we need to lessen rather than expand our experiences.

So basically, I guess what I am trying to say is, unless there is a perceived need to restrict ourselves, instinct dicates we expand on it. So like any addict, until they perceive that need to stop, they not only continue they increase their dosage as the toleration builds.

[Faith-and-Hope]

You got it ! Only "increased dosage' has morphed into new-behaviour-pattern instead .... and he is being inventive .... keeping his weight within normal boundaries, even though the counsellor said it is in fact anorexia .... wearing thin, knitted woollen long sleeved t-shirts that resemble cotton ones, so you would have to be paying attention to realise ..., Slatheting his hair and skin with conditioners / moisturisers to fisguise how dry they are .... drinking electrolyte solutions to keep electrolytes in balance ..., wearing thermal shoes .... and on it goes ...

This is where I have been told it's not sustainable, and the wheels are gonna fall off somewhere .... so we are waiting for a collapse to occur, basically.

[Owlunar]

Hi @Spookytookims@Faith-and-Hope

Well said with good info here

Hi Faith - I am glad to catch up - and yes - I find it hard to read other people's comments on Coping with Husbands MIs - so this is an easy thread to read atm

I have no idea how you manage all of that - it seems that WH is good on efforts to hide the truth from himmself - I guess no one is getting younger though and in time he will eventually see this

All the best with it - and I think I read that you are planning an overseas trip again this coming Christmas - I guess you will go to Greece again

So until the wheels fall off - I still care - but struggle to make a sensible comment

Dec