early twenties lament

[werai]

I went to see my GP today for a checkup but with the intent of raising issues about my mental health. I came out of there feeling shameful that I couldn't open up about my depression. When I got into the car my Mum asked why I was crying. She knows that there is something going on and was open and ready to listen but that same shame made me swallow my tongue. I don't want to scare her. I don't want her or anyone I love to see how broken I feel.

My life is full of many blessings and opportunities but I've fallen into the cycle of isolating myself more and more - cocooning myself in a blanket and letting myself fail because I no longer see the interest in things that were once important to me.

Over the past year I've been smoking weed everyday. An activity that I know is damaging but I don't know how to stop. It's allows me to escape and feel numb to all the negative thoughts.

I think I need help but I don't know how to go about it.

[Alessandra1992]

Hey @werai
It is pretty tough to know when and how to open a conversation about your mental health with your GP or with your mum..
So I am going to ask you, how would you like the conversation to unfold? Your mum already knows you are distressed and she probably won't be surprised if you tell her..
This shame feeling is pretty common and it can be one of our biggest barriers to getting help..but GP's are usually familiar with patients asking for mental health care plans..
And there are youth specific mental health services that you could either ring up or go online.. Such as
e-headspace.
Try and have a chat to your mum as she may be your biggest ally in advocating for you to get help..

The sooner you start the sooner you will improve your mental health..
Take care!!

[Rosie]

Opening up about depresison can be really hard - but having the insight into it makes it less hard. Opening up on this forum is a good start . And you can also find all sorts of really great people who work in mental health and drug rehabilitation. Finding and opening up to these folk will help you a lot. You can try your local community guide, but you said you are in your twenties, well (lucky you) can access headspace!

http://www.headspace.org.au/

"Headspace is helping thousands of young people get thier lives back on track"

I'm a bit old for it, but it looks really cool and a place I would have visited when I was younger.

Hope this helps

Rosie

[Jon22]

I agree with Rosie.
It's hard to open up about depression you've been going through, that's why we have this site to let it all out with the folks here. And you can find help and support here. But it's better to open about it to your GP and/or your Mum.