Hey @fruitisgood I'm sorry to hear you're surfing the waves of numbness and anhedonia. Loss of a sense of joy or desire is one of the hardest things to experience in my books. That feeling of disconnection and apathy can be so excruciating, and I'm sorry that you're sitting in that space right now.
To give you a little idea of what might be going on when you're reaching out for support - many 'brief intervention' roles (i.e. those on helplines) where the MH worker is not having an ongoing relationship with someone, are trained in a strengths-based, solution-focused style. From what you've said, it sounds like you need to be held in your grief and pain, not told how to 'fix' it or told that you're 'doing well despite it all' - even if those things are positives, and maybe worth focusing on at some point, it's okay to feel like that's not what you need right now.
We all deserve validation and reassurance, and honestly I can say from experience that feeling heard and understood in our pain, and in a way that is that focused on right here, right now, can be really powerful. And like...yeah, if there's too much focus on some nebulous future that feels out of reach, it can feel very misattuned, even painful, and sometimes even perpetuate feelings of shame that we don't feel able to 'solve' our feelings.
It's so valid to feel a sense of frustration, and also valid to tell MH workers who are supporting you that you don't need solutions or positive angles, you just need to feel heard.
As for trichotillomania, funnily enough this came up in a conversation I was having recently on the forums! If you feel up to it, you're more than welcome to create a thread centred on this topic, as there may be a few people around who can relate to it. I used to have it mildly myself, and now my shins are half-bald even a decade later 😅
It's tough when it's an experience that's not often spoken about, but maybe you can kick start the conversation! Up to you 💜
