Absolutely @TheRenegade345 . Terribly terribly difficult. 15 years of absolute torture. I was sectioned in acute care many many times. I can't even begin to explain what it was like. Literally on the brink of death.
That's why everyday, I'm in awe that I'm still alive. I never thought I would get to where I am now. In a way, compared to my sisters, I'm a 'slow developer' in that I've always taken longer to get to where they so easily get to. My sisters are both married and one has 3 kids and the other has 2. They've got everything, and I used to question why they have things so easy.
Nowadays, I don't compare myself to them because I just know my path is different to theirs and I always take longer with eveything.
As for the neural pathways business, I have a teacher friend whose daughter is not good at maths. Everytime I see them, she always tells me that they are exercising their daughter's math brain to get it stronger.
I certainly feel this is the same with positive self talk. It is not about lying to yourself, but to have a recovery focus.
I'm not very good at articulating it, but I know it works.
I'm not sure if you are a reader, but a book that really enlightened me was, "The Woman Who Changed her Brain"... I know this is not seen as an evidence-based piece of literature, but I can say it really opened my eyes to see that how I see things is control by no one, but ME.
