Never being in a relationship

[rav3n]

oh nooo i'm sorry for bringing up the topic - definitely wasn't my intention to make you feel sad. personally i don't see anything wrong with surrogacy - there are some single parents who are better parents than those in a relationship, so to me - it doesn't matter 'how' you got your child, what matters is how you raise them. 

you are NOT a pathetic mess for not having a partner or kids yet. you are worthy as you are, and it's okay to want those things too but don't forget to remind yourself that 'not having' does NOT equal not worthy. 

[TheRenegade345]

@rav3n @tyme 

I want to be in a relationship, I dont want to have to go down the expensive pathway of being a loser and in surrogacy.

I am actually filled with so much rage right now. I have no support on this and I only get rejected and invalidated I hate this planet so much

[TheRenegade345]

@rav3n @tyme 

[edited by moderator]

I do not have the evolutionary fitness because I am exhausted all the time and have absolutely no energy to do anything. [edited by moderator]

[TheRenegade345]

@rav3n @tyme 

[edited by moderator]

The only stuff I can find are NT crap that essentially blames the man if the date goes poorly.

I am not evolutionary fit and I will die alone

[tyme]

Seriously speaking, the way you share your thoughts on the forums, is that how you speak to people when you are on a date? @TheRenegade345 

Just curious... 

I care and that's why I want to tell you that from my point of view, your thought patterns are so unhealthy. It's like you are digging a hole of yourself. It sounds like the world is doing its best to be unjust to you... 

Seriously, from my perspective if you want things to change, it comes from you. Not the system mate. If you don't see there is help for people like you - you be the help. If you don't see there are programs for people like you - make the program. If you don't see there are advocates for people like you - then YOU be the advocate.

I've known people who can only see they are the victim. I'd look outside.

Sorry to be so blunt, but we cannot make a person see outside if they don't want to. At the same time, nothing is going to change otherwise.

No need to respond. It just hurts to see the way you post.

Good bye.

[TheRenegade345]

@tyme 

I dont speak like this because this part of me isn't who I am. I am scared and alone and I dont know where else to go.

Believe me, I have tried to be an advocate and I have tried to make programs and start things. I tried to run a mens mental health group which never got off the ground. I tried running an ND social group that also never got off the ground. I have tried running a dating group that never got off the ground. Also keep in mind all of these things ultimately cost a couple of thousand of dollars to run for nothing to happen, particularly in this cost of living crisis, it hit really hard.

I am not having a go at you or anyone, I dont mean to. I am just so frustrated that we have national mental health organisations that do nothing for people like me. I have repeatedly contacted them as well and found that while they acknowledged it is a gap in the knowledge, some organisations never got back to me or some just ignored my message.

Believe me I am trying so damn hard to be an advocate and I have spent time and money trying to do it. It is not as simple as saying I should just do it (I am trying so very hard and I have the receipts to show for it). I dont have any other place to show my frustration over the fact we live in a world that just doesn't get it. That's why I come here to express that, it is unhealthy and I wish I didn't have to (I hate myself for it and I feel bad) but how else can we advocate for this issue when no one is willing to help or assist.

I am sorry if you feel I am pushing you away. I am wondering if I should just back away entirely from forums because it doesn't seem to be helping anyone (and me). But I wish I could provide more context in person, then you will know the extent of the effort I have put in to be the change and be the advocate you say I should be. I have tried and tried but there is no one willing to help or engage in the service.

Maybe it's best I leave for a while and not talk here. I worry I am just pushing everyone away.