Never being in a relationship

[TheRenegade345]

@rav3n 

Thank you for the links. I have registered for the second one you sent me. The other one has groups that have never gotten back to me. Unfortunately there have been a few groups like that.

I do have a lot of things that I am interested in, like music or history. But there aren't any history groups around that I can find plus I am not a great musician and the music groups I have tried were with others who were much better than me at music. I felt completely out of my depth there.

The dating apps are dead. Particularly if you are a man and a bit introverted like me. Women are not even remotely interested in you. I have disclosed my neurodivergence but it hasn't worked. I can count on one hand how many dates I have been on in my life and not one has gotten past the first date.

I live in Melbourne so there shouldn't be any shortage of groups (but there is for me). I feel completely lost and isolated in the world and no one cares about me at all. I dont think there is anything out there for me at all. I have been trying for over ten years.

[rav3n]

@TheRenegade345 ugh that's annoying that they never got back to you! fingers crossed the other one you registered for responds back soon though. i'm going to try keep an eye out for any other ADHD related groups in Melbourne as well, and let you know if I find new ones.

history and music are really great interest areas! have you ever just gone to a museum and started a conversation with a stranger about the art/history on display? (i haven't haha it's on my bucket list but was just wondering if that's something you've tried before or something you'd try in the future?)

what type of art/history are you interested in?

yeah dating apps are a bit iffy sometimes. i can be quite introverted myself and i've noticed that each time i've downloaded the apps, i've had a complete different experience - not sure if that's a good or bad thing though 😅

i'm heading off for tonight but i do want to say - although you haven't made the connection you wanted in the real world yet, i hope you know that the platonic connections made on this forum are real. and connecting with you over this has been lovely for me too, i really appreciate you sharing and opening up. i wish i could make that loneliness vanish. in the meantime, we're always here for you 💙

[tyme]

Hey @TheRenegade345 , what have you been up to in keeping yourself busy?

Please know I'm thinking of you and hope you are okay.

[TheRenegade345]

@rav3n @tyme 

They still haven't got back to me.

Yeah I have and I have tried it. Doesn't lead to anything so I haven't done it in a while.

My main areas of history are in classical history (roman and greek or particularly the Hellenistic period or the early imperial period in Rome).

My experience of dating apps are pretty much the same all the time. They are on life support with the occasional burst of life that is ephemeral and nothing else.

My days have been spent working or just coming home. I dont have much else to do or even the energy to do anything else. I am so sad, I am trying to find videos of others in my position but it doesn't fill me with hope. I am just going to die a lonely, sexless man.

[tyme]

Arggghhh @TheRenegade345 , I don't know what to say. 

A hug?

[TheRenegade345]

@tyme 

Unfortunately there is not much to say, this is just the way the world is and has always been for me. Romance and love is not meant for me

[tyme]

Do you think grieving over the loss of what you don't currently have might stop you from experiencing the things you do have and could have? @TheRenegade345 

I don't know how else to put it.

[TheRenegade345]

@tyme 

I do agree with you, though I think it's grieving over things that I have put a lot of effort into and have seen no gain whatsoever. Whereas others can put in a minimal amount of effort and get much more out of life. 

Honestly, I feel like I'm slipping. I want to cry and feel completely isolated on this issue. What resources or supports are there for this specific thing? I dont think I have much more to give in my life. Death feels like the only release.

[tyme]

So are you saying love, marriage and intimacy is all you want out of life and if you don't have it, then you don't want life @TheRenegade345 ?

[TheRenegade345]

@tyme 

No it is definitely not the only thing I want in life. There are other things too that I cant achieve. But the things you mentioned are definitely things I would like and have no access to currently. 

I have put a lot of effort into a lot of different things and yet I have nothing to show for it.