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Re: Compassion

Yes I realise NOW ... that some women do that .. and it makes it bad for everybody ... raises suspicions ... I was upset the other day when my son was telling me how much money he made busking and his girlfriend corrected him .. because she counted it ...

weird ... he was just rounding it up to the nearest dollar ... and she told him off for not being accurate .. it was his business ... why would you interrupt the conversation anyway .. it was rude and unnecessarily nitpicky ... son accepted it .. but I worried.

She is lucky he let her touch it.

Re: Compassion

Hello Appleblossom.
I wish you, your family snd your frienfs a merry Christmas and s happy New Year.
Misty.

Re: Compassion

Dearest @MistyMirrors

I really like your beginning message
As I keep on forgetting what anallogy means and my partner is not here to tell me : I like that you wrote your own life next to religion

Cheers Pp

Re: Compassion

Dear @Misty-Mirror @Neb
@Defiant-Panda and mods

I fall apart completely if I get criticised - not in every situation but where it's not warrented where it's not fair

Re: Compassion

Thank you @Misty-Mirrors.  lovely to hear from you.  Have a happy and holy and wholesome christmas too.

 

I sang at our carol service last night and look forward to singing at midnight mass.

 

 

My son rides along with her "corrections" and interjections@PeppiPatty  and she can get angry easily but at least is admitting that it is for insufficient reason.

ie he thought he had finished working on car and went to have a shower ... and she went mad at him in bathroom etc ... as we were still checking tyres .. but then she carries on when we speak in mild tones with a request not anger.  Like "please dont interrupt me when i am speaking to my son". 

I am worried that the accumulation of her criticism will diminish his self esteem.  When she points out things I also try and take her views seriously. I am pretty flexible, but my neck is not and I am emotionally very sensitive.

 

Neb
Senior Contributor

Re: Compassion

Hi MistyMirrors.....I liked your post and had a bit of a think about my own experience. Although we are probably very dissimilar I have had a bit of an epiphany re my interpersonal relationships. I am quite dis functional and have always been at odds with workplace superiors. I felt very put upon, but lately.....I no longer work, I wonder if I have had some sort those syndromes dumped on kids today....not ADHD but possibly along the autism spectrum, or maybe it is just the product of the traumatic past.  

Hope your Advent has been spiritually uplifting. I love Christmas, the whole glory of Midnight Mass with that sense of expectation throughout carols and rosary, the packed church, the silence until the bell calls us to attention and. ........

 

Re: Compassion

Hello PeppiPatti.

Thank you for your compliment. I think that God the Father deliberstely gave Christ a horrific death so that our eventual death will seem easy in comparison.

I am getting better at accepting criticism. Criticism hurts me more if I respect the person who criticizes me.

Hello Appleblossom.

I wish you a happy New Year also.

I think that criticism can diminish our self esteem if we take the criticism on board. I ask my Higher Power to help me with my shame/self esteem.

Hello Neb.

In my writing I generally try to provoke thought and offer sympathy.

It often is hurtful when we are criticized at work. Many manager lack sensitivity. Another attribute is the following: my appesrance is that of a tough man. I am not tough! I am sensitive. Other people think they don't need to be gentle with me. (Also some manager made fun of me.)

I attended a midnight mass with an introductory carol session. I enjoyed it. It strengthened my faith.

Re: Compassion

Hello Misty

I adapt the idea of interior castle to protect my heart. 

Criticism is tricky.

I would like to think I can handle it .. or at least the idea that if I am doing something wrong that I want to be able to discuss it ... though I know I am defensive too.  I have improved in that I used to try to be perfect and now at least have faced up to fact that I am far from it ... 

I am getting better with my very tough recorder teacher .. but she praises too.. so it feels balanced and not hurtful ..and there the intention is to learn. 

I managed to talk a bit with the son's girl and I hope that works out .. they seem keen on each other ... and it is good to watch a relationship blossom.

I hope you have a good New Year too @Misty-Mirrors.. I will see the Sydney fireworks this year and will think of you.

Re: Compassion

Dear @Misty-Mirrors

 

Thankyou for answering. I am very sorry that your manager treats you like he does. It breaks my heart a tiny bit actually. It feels unfair that you are going out of your way to get online to sort this out and this manager is using his higher position on you.

I wonder if you gently but continously just say, "Im not who you think I am.' 

Does that feel like something that you would say or something that he will listen to?

 

Re: Compassion

Hello Appleblossom.

The concept of perfectionism is difficult. Many people know intellectually that they are not perfect. Few people have conditioned their feelings appropriately. Example: I might know that I cannot hang my favourite picture perfectly horizontally on the wall, but I still feel uncomfortable when I notice that it doesn't hang perfectly horizontally.
It is good when a mother takes an interest in the friend/friends of a child.
I hope you enjoyed the fireworks. I went out for a meal with a group to the Rocks. I left at 8 pm. I didn't watch the fireworks.

Hello PeppiPatty.

I am retired now. When I talked about my work I was talking about the past. Are you still working? A lot of people are insensitive or lack the ability to be sympsthetic.

Misty.