Dealing With My Mental Illness in Isolation

[ivana]

Are you able to feel negative emotions such as sadness or depression?

[Appleblossom]

It takes time to deal with such a tremendous lot of loss to.

I dont think I could write down my feelings as such but I keep on trying to learn new things and explore ideas ...

sometimes I get flashes of insight about the past and my feelings and reactions .... I am not good on an instantaneous interaction.  The world of ideas seem to be easier for me than to have relationships ... even though I try hard ... they are often not very satisfactory.... but at least I am doing something.

You have the date of your last good times locked in ... it must have been very special.

[Craznar]

@ivana Yes, I'm able to feel any emotions really, just unable to handle them or express them in isolation.

However - I just haven't had any thing to feel good about for over a decade.

[Craznar]

@Appleblossom - time doesn't help me due to the Alexithymia. All that stuff is still unhandled, I've had no-one to talk to about any of them. No grieving done for lost ones.

Oh - it isn't locked in, I google the event (I remember what it was) to find out when it was.

[Appleblossom]

When you have been in a state for a long time it is hard to imagine the possibility of change.But change can happen in unexpected ways.

I had a glitch in time that I googled about ... and then I met the fellow who had uploaded the official information elsewhere ... on this site ... weird ...

I lived in physical and emotional agony for about 12 years .. I am surprised and glad to say that mostly now the pain is manageable and mild, tho chronic.

There is lots I cant change and I have had a lot of grief too.

The invitation of the forums is to start to share .. start to express it in big clumps or short bursts ...as you feel fit.

some people struggle with the forum guidelines but they are limits in place as a protective measure .. the people here are vulnerable .. I work with the guidelines and dont let them bother me ... but get the message out ..

[Drewbola]

Yes thanks

[Ulysses]

Ahhh reading your post makes me so disappointed in the system. & worried for myself.. I've only been diagnosed with depression, anxiety & an eating disorder for the last 3 months and I've seen 2 doctors & 4 psychologists.. im only 20 years old. I may be bipolar also.. I'm glad I joined this forum & glad you have too.. You aren't alone! (I'm sure you've heard that before, I have!) the thing that frustrates me the most people who have no idea what depression is like. System review & education!

[Craznar]

Sadly, I am alone - and there is nothing to be done about it.

If I was depressed, at least I might be able to be treated. As it is - there is no affordable treatment option for me at all.

When the specialists who can help are charging $400 for 30 minutes, with no guarantees - mental health is a rich person's business.

[Drewbola]

I totally agreed Mental health is a mirage I see the signs Hear the words can taste the idea of balance
Just can't afford the care without giving up the balance altogether