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[Nana2]

Hi

i am a 57 yr old Nan of 8 grandchildren and 2 of those children are in our care permanently. We are trying to deal with trauma affected behaviour. I am struggling with this. I have done a carers course for trauma affected children and have read through many tips and information forms. Most of which say things I already know. The hardest thing for me is trying not to react when I’m angry. The harder I try the less it works. 
The child’s big emotions are at school and have been big angry outburst eg tipping up desks, throwing iPads around, wiping everything off shelves. It got to the point where the teacher had to clear the room so no one got caught in the crossfire. Towards the end of last year she started striking out at other children which seen her sent home twice. She is only 6yrs old.

These outbursts or “flipping her lid” only happens at school.

I have recently noticed over the last couple of months that she has got very controlling over her sibling and with us.

She is currently seeing a councillor with sessions at school and1 on 1 sessions too.

We are running low on ideas and a bit of energy. In need of help please

[rav3n]

hey @Nana2 welcome to the forums, glad to see you join us 😊

i'm sorry to hear you've been having a tough time recently, emotions like anger can be really difficult to approach and i can see how overwhelming it must be not knowing how to help the people we care about the most. its great that your grandchild sees a counsellor for 1:1 sessions, talking through the trauma affected behaviours is so important - does she talk to you about it too? feeling angry is a very normal human emotion but often we don't deal with it in the healthiest ways - its so good of you to avoid being reactive, however its so important that both you and your granddaughter have a space to healthily release that emotion. here are some ways i've tried, i know everyone is different but i thought i'd share some ideas to see if any of these are ways you'd like to try/have tried?

• Journaling - just putting our feelings into words can help create some clarity and calm. You can even rip up the pages after you write it or scrunch it into a ball and throw it (these are just suggestions to make writing out feelings a bit more 'fun' for younger kids)
• Sports - any form of exercise is usually a great way to release some of that frustration physically, even something as simple as walking would be great!
• Dance/singing - sometimes music helps regulate our emotions, connecting to a song that you resonate with or just shaking out your feelings
• Throwing - in a safe environment like a backyard, giving her some space to throw soft things (like having a target and throwing water balloons)

I'm sure other members on this forum will be able to share some great ideas with you too! While you're taking care of your grandkids, don't forget to take care of you! Self-care is so important and your mental health matters too 💗

[_tired_]

Hello everyone,

I'm hoping these forums can help alleviate the feeling of loneliness.

I'm not feeling that great today, and just really need to connect.

One of my family members are struggling with their mental health, this impacts my mental health.

Im waiting on supports to help me with this.

So I'm really just needing a place to share, to help ease the build up.

I was recently diagnosed with ADHD combined.

I also have complex PTSD.

2 of my adult children live at home with me.

1 has been diagnosed with Autism, PTSD, agoraphobia with panic disorder and a personality disorder, not specified.

And the other with Bipolar 1, ADHD and PTSD.

[RiverSeal]

Hey @_tired_, welcome to the Forums and thanks for sharing with the community!

I'm sorry to hear that you are not doing so great today and are being triggered by someone else. It sounds tough and I hope your support can help you with the impact.

The Forums are a great place to share your experiences and meet other people if you want to take a look around. If you want to tag someone, use the @symbol and their Username and they will get an email to let them know about your post.

There's a post here that link s you to some place to post that might interest you: Looking for a space to connect with others? Find a... - SANE Forums

Thanks for sharing with your peers!

RiverSeal 

[_tired_]

Thank you, I will have a look around and familiarise myself a bit more.

[Shaz51]

hello and welcome @_tired_ 

how are you going today 

[_tired_]

Hey @Shaz51  Its a ' self care ' kind of day lol.

My daughter stopped her antidepressants and other medication [edited by moderator] a few days ago, ( without my or her GPs knowledge ) so she is going through the affects of that, while starting antipsychotic medication after I called her GP to explain what had happened. ( With my daughter's consent ). Today she is struggling with her mental health, but she is communicating with me on how she is feeling, so I'm making sure she is safe. As she is not feeling safe.

We are going to go and watch the sun set in a few hours, something we both enjoy.

Thank you for asking.

I hope your doing okay, and that you find something in today that makes you smile 🌻

[rav3n]

hey @_tired_ @Nana2 @canberran welcome! 😊

how's everyone's week been? hope you all caught some of the lovely sunshine that's been coming through 🌞

[_tired_]

Not much sunshine here today, but I still enjoy the colours of a Winter's day 😊

[rav3n]

hey there @_tired_ 😊

the cool tones of winter are quite nice too aren't they! once it's actually summer, the heatwaves will probably make me miss the winter days more.

also wanted to share a quick tip - when you want to reply to someone, you can @ them and type in their username so they get notified for your response. just like this: @_tired_ hope that helps!