Best Friends Club

[Gremlin24]

@Jynx the signs are there that things are too much but tonight I'm just trying to ignore them. I just don't have it in me to reach out other than just being here right now. 

It's been happening every night for the past couple of weeks now and it's getting worse. It's not even a gradual build up, i wake up full on panicking, struggling to breathe, my heart pounding so hard and fast and my whole body shaking. 

[Jynx]

@Blackcloud yeah you should definitely get to choose!! Ugh fingers crossed for ya 🤞

@Shaz51 could be that it is sparking something from childhood; were you criticised a lot as a kid? Sometimes even when our logic-brain knows we ought not to take something personally, our little inner child is still too reminded of that pain and feels it all anyway. Could be something for therapy?

[Blackcloud]

Hi @rav3n @that’s what I was just thinking as well haha xD it’s all good now though, because I realised that I’m actually looking for support workers that are more of like..mental health support workers, so I’m not sure if that service actually has those types of support workers.

I’m currently in touch with another relevant (NDIS support worker) service that actually has mental health support workers so if the previous one does not have those kinds of support workers, then I can move onto the other service that’s on the latter for that 🙂

[Jynx]

@Gremlin24 that's super distressing, I can totally understand why bed feels unsafe for you at the moment. Panic attacks are sooooo hectic, always leave me feeling very shaky and frazzled. So you're also probably pretty under-slept too at the moment? I find it handy to factor that kinda stuff in when I'm feeling ooky - so I am able to say to myself 'It's okay to feel like my brain is soup, I'm just exhausted' instead of like 'Why is my brain soup? Oh god no not again what is it this time?' yaknow? 

[rav3n]

ahh yep i get what you mean @Blackcloud that's great you've got a lil back up service too if this one doesn't work out! 

when do your classes start back for your course? 

[Gremlin24]

@Jynx It's definitely a difficult thing to be experiencing. Even once the initial panic attack is over I'm still in a constant state of panic after. I don't know just tonight I'm not feeling right both physically and mentally. I'm used to running on little sleep anyway so whilst the exhaustion is factored in to a degree it's definitely not the only reason for me feeling like this. This is so much more than just lacking a bit of sleep. 

[Blackcloud]

@rav3n they start on the 10th February

[Shaz51]

Sure was @Jynx 

That is why mum and I left because my dad ' s behaviour was affecting my health,  physically and mentally and emotionally 

[rav3n]

oh so you got one more month of holidays @Blackcloud do you have any other plans for the break? or just chilling?

[Blackcloud]

@rav3n just chilling I guess whilst still having thoughts about no one acknowledging my existence in this world and thinking about what even is the point of existing when all I get is being completely ignored by everyone in real life and no one willing to make me feel welcomed and comfortable and nobody willing to like me nor talk to me or make me feel heard….because everyday is such a struggle…. I’m safe though don’t worry, it’s just those kinds of intrusive thoughts that I have when it comes to having to continue living my life like this ongoingly…