Making friends with BPD

[ontheborderline]

Hey guys, I recently got diagnosed with BPD. For a while, I've struggled to form and maintain friendships and I wondered if anyone had any tips. I'm in Melbourne, Aus and I was wondering if there are any groups for people with BPD or activities to get involved in?

[Cathie2]

Hi there

I recently have been diagnosed also and from Melbourne

I am interested in groups too - I will follow this thread if ok with you

Cathie

[Emergence]

Hi @ontheborderline and @Cathie2,

I can recommend Grow (https://grow.org.au), it's a peer support group for people who've experienced mental health issues in the present or past. The meetings themselves are based on the 12 step program and generally involve people talking about their experiences with mental health as well as opportunities for people to support each other practically. In the meetings I've gone to, people are encouraged to exchange numbers to support each other throughout the week if they're comfortable, as well as attend organised group events like movie nights and so forth.

[tyme]

Dear all @Emergence @ontheborderline @Cathie2 ,

I found the Australian BPD Foundation super helpful when it can to accessing services and groups for BPD.

They release a regular newsletter, and in it, you can find many support groups for those with BPD in each Australian State.

https://www.bpdfoundation.org.au/

Click on "News and Events" and you can sign up to their Newsletter. 

They sometimes run online groups, or f2f groups which you can attend.

I myself had my BPD treatment at Spectrum in Victoria. https://www.spectrumbpd.com.au/

I had 18 months of MBT (mentalisation based therapy). It was so incredibly helpful, now that I look back. I didn't think it was helpful when I was going through it because it was so triggering and hard, but looking back, I can't believe how much I have changed. I just wish it was more available to the wider community. I believe it is very hard to get access to this treatment. I don't know how I managed to get in.

[BPDSurvivor]

Hi @ontheborderline @Cathie2 ,

 When I was going through the darkest times, my key clinician was interested in getting me into some non-BPD/mental health groups. Why? Because it would help get my mind off only mental health.

 So for me, I reckon it’s good to have balance. Engage in some BPD/mental health groups as well as non-mental health groups.

for me, I have so many activities that my local council run. They have walking groups, walking football, dance, coffee and chat, art and craft, Pilates, fitness, kickboxing, swimming etc. These are all free of charge and run throughout the day/week. I used to also participate in watercolour colour painting groups 7-9pm which was run by my local library. Because these are all free, I could attend easily.

I don’t go to many now because my work demands more. But certainly worth while looking at what your council or library offers.

I still can’t say I have ‘friends’ but that’s because I don’t want any. I want to come home and have a break from people. People want to connect and chat, but I seriously have a life to continue with. So I don’t think I lack possibke friendships, I just choose to push them away. But yes, I’m these activities and groups, I have met ppl who I connect with from time to time.

[BPDSurvivor]

Hi @ontheborderline @tyme @Emergence @Cathie2 ,

How are you all?

[BPDSurvivor]

Oh, I forgot to mention @ontheborderline @Emergence @Cathie2  , after I posted about all the events my local library offers (post above), I signed up to a Cricut project group, lantern-making, 3D printing bookmark making, mug design group, star gazing.... 

Pretty cool, eh?

[outlander]

hi @ontheborderline @Cathie2 @Emergence

im not in melbourne but i can see others have already reccomended some different groups. some community mental health services also offer groups.

i also have bpd and while i found it ok to connect with other with BPD, I also found it quite tricky to manage my own emotions. sometimes i feed off others so if everyone was emotional that day it would turn me all emotional as well. as most know with bpd we tend to feel things more intensely so for me i actually found it better to engage in other activities rather then those focused on mental health. i joined hobby groups or i met people through my own hobbies or likes. i started walking every day and now every now and then i join up with someone else who is walking. sometimes we talk and other times we each have our headphones in and just keep walking without really having to say a word.

facebook and social media pages are really good for finding groups as well.

[outlander]

hey also @BPDSurvivor

[tyme]

How are you travelling @ontheborderline @Emergence @Cathie2 ?