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Something’s not right

TopDeck
Contributor

Not sure what to do

I am not quite sure what to do with my outlook on life and my feelings towards the world. I feel as though it might get ridiculed here, but I'm stuck looking for like-minded people who could relate to me on this. There isn't many people out there that think like this, and with the limited amount of support I am not sure what to do.

 

I believe the meaning of life, or at least the meaning of life interpreted by the government is control.

School was the indoctrination process, developed at a young age as a child's mind is more malleable and easier to manipulate.

Mental health, the police, the government, employers etc. preserve the indoctrination and force compliance.

In short, we have been brainwashed. You work to pay taxes, make other people richer and then die.

Mental health is rife with abuse especially in psych wards. Many times I've been admitted and abused by security guards, nurses, doctors, psychiatrists etc.

 

I am stuck with this line of thought and I am not sure how to proceed with life.

I'm thinking at this stage it's either adapt or perish, but that can't be the only way. Should I learn and look at more information? Even then, it's hard to discern what's actually the truth as knowledge is not power - but belief. Nothing more.

 

Anyway, I'm sorry if this has offended anyone. A lot of people don't like my way of thinking and don't respond to it well, so I understand.

2 REPLIES 2

Re: Not sure what to do

hi, i'm an old guy, not without my own problems all my life, lived as a kind of outsider really. I don't know your age but i'm assuming you are young-ish.

 

when you said knowledge is not power, i think myself that knowledge is truth, it's not knowledge that sets you free, but understanding things, 

 

if yiur not not sure what to do with your life i am also assuming you are not studying anything worthwhile? maybe working in a dead end job. When i was at my rock botton picked up myself enough to go do a course. You don't have to decide right now what you want to be, or who you are, not everyone can know this, but "doing something" is a great way to start any journey. 

 

For example, i studied english literature, then dropped out and years later studied anthropology, these were undergrad degrees so they were the real deal. In the end i started to understand i had great anxiety about money and survival, having grown up in abject poverty. So i ended up taking courses as a tech in computing. Not ideal but it gave me instant money back then and i could work for myself. 

 

theres someone for everyone, but also people will always find the thing they really want to do. The universe does all that but the starting point is to start doing something.

Former-Member
Not applicable

Re: Not sure what to do

Hi @TopDeck 

 

sorry for the late message, I had it in my drafts, I wasn't sure if I should post it. 

take care, here's the message:

 

No one has the right to make you feel ridiculed, your opinion and views are valid. I am really sorry to hear about your experiences in the mental health system and I hope you have now or will find better support. It took me some time to find 'the right fit' and I also needed to learn that my therapy wouldn't be done & dusted in 10 sessions.

 

I read your post and found myself in some of the reasoning. I don't understand many constructs & concepts in our society & the world and believe brainwashing is part of being human. There is probably another word for brainwashing though. For me brainwashing starts from birth by our care givers, teachers, friends, religion, advertising, books we read... I'm on the autism spectrum. I'm questioning my gender identity. When I became mentally unwell a few years ago and my work got rid of me. People judge and I don't fit in their boxes anymore - I tried and was pretty good pretending. I masked all my life. I'm in my 40s now. How old are you? 

For me learning & knowledge has always been and is still important even if my brain doesn't work as it used to be. I'm learning what new things, art, reading about mindfulness, learning about DBT, doing therapy... it's all part of learning & knowledge for me. But I'm also starting to learn how to be honest to myself. That's the first step for me before I can stop hiding. It will take time though. 

I learn & keep being reminded to pay attention to the current moment. Mindfulness. Another construct I don't understand, I understand it intellectually, but often cannot feel it. But I keep trying out different things & found I love painting. And I think that's what life is supposed to be about, to live in the moment. 

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