Forums Home

Lived Experience Forum

Acceptance, connection, support. Share the journey.

Safe, anonymous discussion for people living with complex mental health issues, moderated 24/7 by mental health professionals.

Read the community guidelines
cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Something’s not right

Highlighted
Casual Contributor

Event Earworm

Im not entirely sure what this is or if anyone else experiences this but I'm hoping Im not alone and can find some tips for managing.

 

3 days ago I received a message from my husband's ex, all on good terms as for we have a blended family and we all are very respectful. Unfortunately the conversation became quite tense (which is unusual in our circumstanse) and had left me quite enraged... although I was able to manage my emotion during the dispute and we ended the conversation civilly, it left me in complete shut down. 

2 days post and like a song you just cannot get out of your head this event played over and over and over again. Each time it played I would find myself recapping or responding verbally to myself, with the situation catastrophizing each time in my head. I was unable to sleep for 2 nights due to nightmares. I hid from people because I believe that everyone hates me and even trying to have a conversation with my husband the event would come up. My head was so loud i just felt like there was no escape.

 

Today being the 3rd day and it's gone. No voices, No feeling,s no recaps nothing just peace.  

 

Although this for me was the shortest time frame example, usually depending on the event it could play out longer. Is there anyone out there the same? Any coping strategies? Can you overcome it quicker? 

 

Background: CPTSD, depression, anxiety, BP. 

 

 

3 REPLIES 3

Re: Event Earworm

@BPTrivicalBPD  Hey BPtrivicalBPD  my ex has a gf who is super weird with me. When he had his motorcycle accident she rang his brother who rang my 84 year old mother who then rang me!!! I was livid as this is how it went until my ex  was able to call me himself. I am really angry about it as it is such a stupid situation imagine both her and his brother contacting me through my mother at her age ..... she doesnt need this kind of stress plus she really is not that interested in my ex to begin with.

 

I have schizoaffective disorder and alot of my stress and pychosis symptoms are controlled by my meds.  Other than that I try not to think about what is stressig me out. I try not to care (gain a tougher skin) it is hard but it works for me. I hope this helps. greenpeaxx

 

 

Re: Event Earworm

Hi @BPTrivicalBPD , 

It plays out for me that way too. It’s usually three days but can be longer. I found that time and acceptance that it is a part of my life are the best things I’ve done. In the heat of this I don’t remember that it will pass and that it’s not life ending. 

I would in the past talk in my head to the person for up to 10 hours a day. That was a long time ago but it still happens occasionally. 

 

Im not sure if you have someone that is a good support for you that can remind you that it will pass. I used to despise being told this but over time it become more and more true. It’s my therapist that I rely on most for this. I can contact her most days if needed (I rarely do contact her now outside of our appointments, but it’s reassuring that I can). I still sometimes feel like she is not hearing me but because she knows me so well, I know she does. I have been seeing her for 8 years so she often knows me better than I know myself. Long story long it’s helpful to have someone listen and give you reassurances that it’s ok or bounce ideas off. Sometimes in the past for me that is using the forum or helpline. 

 

Its great you got through it and can look back with insight now. I can imagine the very big feelings and thought cycles you must have felt during that time. Kudos for holding it together at the time too, that’s a hard thing when everything starts to overwhelm. 😊

Re: Event Earworm

hey @BPTrivicalBPD 

the symptom you describe is my daily life. My daily torment. All day, all nite, every day.

 

It's psychotic symptoms. Anti psychotics prescribed by a psychiatrist has helped  bit.

 

With respect, that you can get rid of it in just just a matter of days it is a gift! Wow you are resilient. Mine lasts weeks. When one epside ends the next one just starts up. It is constant, endless day and night. Anti-psychotics med s helps a  bit to help me sleep & get some relief but mostly I just mask it & don't let anybody know so I don't lost my job & dont lose any of my frienships. I just hide it as I know no-one can handle truth.

 

Maybe its PSTD for you and you can get effective treatmem process the memories that huant you. Sadly I can't so I just have to make he best that I can with living with these symptoms of living unporcessed nitemares of the abuses of my past. I am medicated so musch that I can work & earn m owm monmey. But I hope you can do more than that and be free from your nitemares treatmentand life the life that you want to.

For urgent assistance, call: