Our stories
Thank you @Corny
There was a Rainbow Band.
and I could mention my raging queen uncle with understanding.
Was a little heavy handed with spice in my sweet potato soup, but added lots cauli to "water it down".
I love cauliflower @Appleblossom, yummy! I love the Lebanese recipe with tahini sauce and I also love roasted with a little bit of cumin and it can go great in curries too.
I never had a raging queen aunt or uncle that would have helped me a lot in my younger years making sense of my sexuality. I am the only gay in a very very Catholic family so as you can imagine that was quite interesting 
Fires are raging in the north west of Sydney and the wind is strong here.
Enjoy your morning 
Hi there @Corny ... sounds like you are doing pretty well since you 'checked out' of The Ritz.
I too love anything cauliflower ... soups, salads, steamed, morney'd, curried, etc. And cumin adds a lovely flavour.
Corny, I just wanted to say that I did get your message to me on my thread from earlier this morning, via the email notification. It had gone from the thread by then. In many respects I agree with you, and I dont blame you for feeling the way you do. But when you actually put those thoughts into words, it all seems so terribly harsh. It was only 20 months ago that hubby was at deaths door for a period of some 6 weeks. I was told to 'make arrangements' and that he would never make it home. As you know, he recovered. But his quality of life is not at all good. And there are times I feel almost resentful that he pulled through at all. Because here he is now, making my life so damned difficult. And as I said, his quality of life is very poor. When my mind starts to head in this direction, I think what an absolutely horrible person I am. What person in their right mind would think that way about someone they love? But I cannot help it, sometimes I think that way ... shameful as it is. I really do love him, despite all that he puts me through. But sometimes .. its just all too hard and I cannot handle all that he brings to the table.
Anyway I guess I just wanted to reassure you that what you wrote on my thread was not seen by me as callous, nor was it particularly shocking under the circumstances from where it came. But having said that, I do understand why it was removed. In many ways you simply verbalised what my mind sometimes thinks. And I really hate myself for that, and wish things were different. Thanks for the 3 little muskateer cuddles you sent to my thread too, although unfortunately I never got to see the picture.
The wind here today is very strong too, and the smoke has returned. I think they may be doing more backburning and fire containment in our local fires up here. Its looking like being a very hot week everywhere this week. I do hope Christmas is much cooler. Maybe even some rain? Wouldnt that be lovely! I will do a rain dance in the dry, to bring on the rain, and dance joyously in the rain when it finally comes.
Sherry
Oh yes @Corny I know well ... the catholic issues ... around that stuff.
In my family, while I was growing up, there were 4 gay uncles which is quite a different culture to gay ladies.
Take Care
@Former-Member
Thanks @Corny ... there is nothing to forgive, honestly. All good.
My apologies btw for including you on my LE thread. I recall you had responded to me on my thread, so I included you in my reply there. Unfortunately I only realised after reading your reply here, that it was actually my Carers thread which you had written to me on last time. So in fact it is for me to apologise to you. I realise its a difficult time for you adjusting to life outside of The Ritz an' all. And I can see that my topic of discussion was likely to be triggering for you. I am really sorry. I guess thats why there is a permanent warning on my thread about "possibly triggering material". So please never feel obliged to visit me 'on the other side'. I do hope you are okay?
And of course you mean well ... you always have done, and I very much appreciate your input and wonderful insight. On so many topics ... I think you're great, and wish I was more like you. And yes, you are correct ... perhaps knowing that others, whom I admire, think (or have thought) in a similar line makes me feel just a little less horrible and evil. So thank you for your kindness and understanding.
Sherry 💕
Don't apologise unnecessarily @Former-Member I clicked on the little bell under 'new' posts and could have been more observant what thread I was reading and no one made me reply, that was on me. But if I read about someone being physically abused my frontal lobes do get a little wobbly, and then fire up! Its instinctual for me to defend someone in that situation.
I think that you are being way, way too harsh on yourself. These are very common thoughts and emotions, not just in the family violence context, but also the disability/carer context too, and often if they are not the sort of thoughts you and I have had, they are around the other way where the carer or victim considers taking their own life, even if that leaves others behind to deal with it. Does that make them selfish people for having those thoughts, I really don't think so. Until you have been pushed to that edge of desperation its hard to understand how you can momentarily be unrecognisable to yourself but still be a great person. I remember there were a few programs on SBS Insight and ABC with parents talking about similar emotions and the impact this was having on all of their relationships and the guilt they felt, but they just wanted all the pain to end somehow. I can relate to their desperation.
Here are your 3 little mates to take care of. Enjoy a morning coffee or tea. I don't want the extreme heat to come back, I have no air conditioning and while the light is wonderful in this unit and great for my mood, it swelters like an oven in here. I will just have to make the trek out to the the lady baths and sit by the pool with the mermaids
Big hugs, and check in with your Dad and Bro soon and try and not isolate
